Diary of an insignificant person
My
dear
wife
Carrie
and
I
have
just
been
a
week
in
our
new
house
,
"
The
Laurels
,
"
Brickfield
Terrace
,
Holloway
--
a
nice
six-roomed
residence
,
not
counting
basement
,
with
a
front
breakfast-parlour
.
We
have
a
little
front
garden
;
and
there
is
a
flight
of
ten
steps
up
to
the
front
door
,
which
,
by-the-by
,
we
keep
locked
with
the
chain
up
.
Cummings
,
Gowing
,
and
our
other
intimate
friends
always
come
to
the
little
side
entrance
,
which
saves
the
servant
the
trouble
of
going
up
to
the
front
door
,
thereby
taking
her
from
her
work
.
We
have
a
nice
little
back
garden
which
runs
down
to
the
railway
.
We
were
rather
afraid
of
the
noise
of
the
trains
at
first
,
but
the
landlord
said
we
should
not
notice
them
after
a
bit
,
and
took
#
2
off
the
rent
.
He
was
certainly
right
;
and
beyond
the
cracking
of
the
garden
wall
at
the
bottom
,
we
have
suffered
no
inconvenience
.
After
my
work
in
the
City
,
I
like
to
be
at
home
.
What
's
the
good
of
a
home
,
if
you
are
never
in
it
?
"
Home
,
Sweet
Home
,
"
that
's
my
motto
.
I
am
always
in
of
an
evening
.
Our
old
friend
Gowing
May
drop
in
without
ceremony
;
so
May
Cummings
,
who
lives
opposite
.
My
dear
wife
Caroline
and
I
are
pleased
to
see
them
,
if
they
like
to
drop
in
on
us
.
But
Carrie
and
I
can
manage
to
pass
our
evenings
together
without
friends
.
There
is
always
something
to
be
done
:
a
tin-tack
here
,
a
Venetian
blind
to
put
straight
,
a
fan
to
nail
up
,
or
part
of
a
carpet
to
nail
down
--
all
of
which
I
can
do
with
my
pipe
in
my
mouth
;
while
Carrie
is
not
above
putting
a
button
on
a
shirt
,
mending
a
pillow-case
,
or
practising
the
"
Sylvia
Gavotte
"
on
our
new
cottage
piano
(
on
the
three
years
'
system
)
,
manufactured
by
W.
Bilkson
(
in
small
letters
)
,
from
Collard
and
Collard
(
in
very
large
letters
)
.
It
is
also
a
great
comfort
to
us
to
know
that
our
boy
Willie
is
getting
on
so
well
in
the
Bank
at
Oldham
.
We
should
like
to
see
more
of
him
.
Now
for
my
diary
:
--
April
3
.
--
Tradesmen
called
for
custom
,
and
I
promised
Farmerson
,
the
ironmonger
,
to
give
him
a
turn
if
I
wanted
any
nails
or
tools
.
By-the-by
,
that
reminds
me
there
is
no
key
to
our
bedroom
door
,
and
the
bells
must
be
seen
to
.
The
parlour
bell
is
broken
,
and
the
front
door
rings
up
in
the
servant
's
bedroom
,
which
is
ridiculous
.
Dear
friend
Gowing
dropped
in
,
but
would
n't
stay
,
saying
there
was
an
infernal
smell
of
paint
.
April
4
.
Tradesmen
still
calling
;
Carrie
being
out
,
I
arranged
to
deal
with
Horwin
,
who
seemed
a
civil
butcher
with
a
nice
clean
shop
.
Ordered
a
shoulder
of
mutton
for
tomorrow
,
to
give
him
a
trial
.
Carrie
arranged
with
Borset
,
the
butterman
,
and
ordered
a
pound
of
fresh
butter
,
and
a
pound
and
a
half
of
salt
ditto
for
kitchen
,
and
a
shilling
's
worth
of
eggs
.
In
the
evening
,
Cummings
unexpectedly
dropped
in
to
show
me
a
meerschaum
pipe
he
had
won
in
a
raffle
in
the
City
,
and
told
me
to
handle
it
carefully
,
as
it
would
spoil
the
colouring
if
the
hand
was
moist
.
He
said
he
would
n't
stay
,
as
he
did
n't
care
much
for
the
smell
of
the
paint
,
and
fell
over
the
scraper
as
he
went
out
.
Must
get
the
scraper
removed
,
or
else
I
shall
get
into
a
scrape
.
I
do
n't
often
make
jokes
.
April
5
.
--
Two
shoulders
of
mutton
arrived
,
Carrie
having
arranged
with
another
butcher
without
consulting
me
.
Gowing
called
,
and
fell
over
scraper
coming
in
.
Must
get
that
scraper
removed
.
April
6
.
--
Eggs
for
breakfast
simply
shocking
;
sent
them
back
to
Borset
with
my
compliments
,
and
he
need
n't
call
any
more
for
orders
.
Could
n't
find
umbrella
,
and
though
it
was
pouring
with
rain
,
had
to
go
without
it
.
Sarah
said
Mr.
Gowing
must
have
took
it
by
mistake
last
night
,
as
there
was
a
stick
in
the
'
all
that
did
n't
belong
to
nobody
.
In
the
evening
,
hearing
someone
talking
in
a
loud
voice
to
the
servant
in
the
downstairs
hall
,
I
went
out
to
see
who
it
was
,
and
was
surprised
to
find
it
was
Borset
,
the
butterman
,
who
was
both
drunk
and
offensive
.
Borset
,
on
seeing
me
,
said
he
would
be
hanged
if
he
would
ever
serve
City
clerks
any
more
--
the
game
was
n't
worth
the
candle
.
I
restrained
my
feelings
,
and
quietly
remarked
that
I
thought
it
was
possible
for
a
city
clerk
to
be
a
gentleman
.
He
replied
he
was
very
glad
to
hear
it
,
and
wanted
to
know
whether
I
had
ever
come
across
one
,
for
he
had
n't
.
He
left
the
house
,
slamming
the
door
after
him
,
which
nearly
broke
the
fanlight
;
and
I
heard
him
fall
over
the
scraper
,
which
made
me
feel
glad
I
had
n't
removed
it
.
When
he
had
gone
,
I
thought
of
a
splendid
answer
I
ought
to
have
given
him
.
However
,
I
will
keep
it
for
another
occasion
.
April
7
.
--
Being
Saturday
,
I
looked
forward
to
being
home
early
,
and
putting
a
few
things
straight
;
but
two
of
our
principals
at
the
office
were
absent
through
illness
,
and
I
did
not
get
home
till
seven
.
Found
Borset
waiting
.
He
had
been
three
times
during
the
day
to
apologise
for
his
conduct
last
night
.
He
said
he
was
unable
to
take
his
Bank
Holiday
last
Monday
,
and
took
it
last
night
instead
.
He
begged
me
to
accept
his
apology
,
and
a
pound
of
fresh
butter
.
He
seems
,
after
all
,
a
decent
sort
of
fellow
;
so
I
gave
him
an
order
for
some
fresh
eggs
,
with
a
request
that
on
this
occasion
they
should
be
fresh
.
I
am
afraid
we
shall
have
to
get
some
new
stair-carpets
after
all
;
our
old
ones
are
not
quite
wide
enough
to
meet
the
paint
on
either
side
.
Carrie
suggests
that
we
might
ourselves
broaden
the
paint
.
I
will
see
if
we
can
match
the
colour
(
dark
chocolate
)
on
Monday
.
